Thursday, January 5, 2012

Tears of Joy and Sadness

This past weekend I enjoyed a wonderful trip to Orlando to watch our Gamecocks tear up Nebraska! This was the first time the Hubs and I have been away together since our Honeymoon over 2 years ago! As much as we missed Cooper terribly, and talked about him the entire time....We ventured into Downtown Disney, Boardwalk and made a few other stops to try and enjoy ourselves. This was the first bowl game for both of us and we had a BLAST!!

*Brandon tested his fast ball skills....We are waiting by the phones for the MLB to call...( Notice his name 4th down, and that is "217" next to his name!)

Goooo Cocks!!!

ON ANOTHER NOTE.....(Warning:Emotional Content to Follow)

For those of you that are close to me, you know that I followed the Casey Anthony trial like a hawk. My DVR was slam full whenever I had to be away from home, and I even reactivated my Sirius Radio in my car to listen to the trial while away.
My heart continues to ache for the loss of such a precious little girl, and I cringe every time I see or think of Casey Anthony. I simply cannot comprehend how sick one must be to act the way she did throughout the entire saga of her missing daughter, the trial and all other aspects of her life.
This matter hit my heart very heavy and I am constantly thinking of what a tragic situation it was.

Some of you may not agree with the venture that I made, as my Hubs did not want to partake either. However, I asked him on our way down if we could travel to the site where Caylee's body was found and drive past the Anthony home so that I may say a prayer and pay my respects.
I have to admit, my first thought at doing this, did indeed give me slight excitement (not necessarily "happy" excitement), adrenaline.
However, as we left our hotel Tuesday morning and made the 20 minute drive the Hope Springs Dr and Suburban Drive my stomach began to turn into knots. The closer we got, the worse it became. Even just seeing the street signs of places I had heard so much about made me uneasy.

When we made the right turn onto Suburban drive, it took merely seconds before you began to see the memorial created for little Caylee and the site where she was found. I immediately teared up.
The Hubs pulled over so that I could get out. I walked very slowly the edge of the street where the memorial began. My heart felt as though it was about to jump out of my chest. My eyes were swelling with tears.
I stood there just thinking, praying,and crying for a good 10 minutes. I was shocked at how (NOT) far back she was found from the street. This was unbelievable to me, and truly was even more devastating than I had previously thought.

I gained my composure, took a breath and soaked it all in. I said a prayer for Caylee and turned back to our car.

When traveled *MAYBE* 20 yards from the site to turn left onto Hope Springs Dr. The street where the Anthonys live. When we passed their home, I was in utter disbelief of home unbelievably close their house was the site where Caylee was found. I know that we all have seen the maps they showed on the News describing the proximity, but nothing could have prepared me for this trip in seeing for myself how close together they were. I could have thrown a baseball that distance I believe. Football players could have thrown a pass that distance, EASILY!!!!

I know that some of you may feel that me making a trip there and taking photos was disrespectful. Please believe me when I tell you that I in no way was attempting to disrespect Caylee, the Family or anyone else for that matter.
Although I never knew Caylee and have never met anyone involved, the journey that I spent following her disappearance from the beginning followed by the court trial gave me a sense of compassion and connection. I felt the need, want or necessity (whichever you prefer) to pay my respect.

View from the edge of the street...

You can see in the far distance, where the white sign is placed...Is where they found "something suspicious"

If you look closely, you can still see the marks from the lightening that struck this tree directly at the memorial on the day that Casey learned she would be getting out of Jail...Most definitely a sign from God!

The Anthony Home..

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

So, I suck at this...

Alright, So I officially stink at the blogging world.
I am an expert reader and follower but I just fail in the art of keeping up with my own. As I have recently been told my a sweet friend, I should just Stop! *Thanks Judy :)
I believe the reason I am not persistent is possibly I feel that no one is interested in what I have to say, or wants to see a gazillion photos of my child. Whatever my internal reasoning may be, I am attempting to get over it.
Do I really care that I dont get comments? Does it really matter that no one "subscribes" to my (half existent) blog?

Being a stay at home mom, I do not get the "adult interaction" I was always used to. I do not get to converse about things that I find interesting or just plain need to get off my chest. Of course, I have conversations with my husband, but normally I feel I am talking to a brick wall when I get excited about something I found on Pinterest, or my latest coupon extravaganza, or how I feel like a beached whale being pregnant again!
Lots of things are constantly running through my mind, and I need an outlet.

As troublesome and wishy washy as my blog may be, I have full intentions to continue. I may not blog everyday, and I can promise that a good portion of my post will probably not be interesting to most of you...( If there even is anyone out there) but I need an outlet, and this seems to be my only option.

I seem to be getting this face more often, apparently Cooper does not appreciate good, female bonding and conversation....